Turn Right · Lesson
Recovery
The Hurdles of Recovery means that I am doing those things that are most important in life. A hurdle is defined as something I must get over so that I can progress. Recovery starts today!
What are some of the challenges we must get over to make progress in our lives? What processes must we put energy into so we can have a better tomorrow? Below, we look at some of the arguments used by people who resist recovery and their desire to stay stuck.
Unit One
1) Guilt — “I am the worst of the worst. Just ask anyone.”
- When do I know when I have done something wrong?
- Is doing a wrong thing self-taught, or taught by others?
- Does being wrong about life “feel” bad?
- What are the five worst things I have done in my life?
- List the names of the people who know these things.
2) Condemnation — “The voices around me only hurt me.”
- Is condemnation self-inflicted?
- Do I give other people my ear for advice about right and wrong? Which people?
- If I do the same things wrong over and over, is the wrong distorted — larger or smaller?
- Who tells me most often that I have done a lot of things wrong?
3) Numb to the Needs — “What I need does not matter anyway.”
- What are the ten things I want most out of life? Today or tomorrow, sooner or later?
- Have I ever promised someone else that I would do something just for them — to help them, or to help me?
- What three things do I give up most often in order to help others? What three things do I need the most help with?
- In all honesty, is there anyone I borderline hate? Who do I love the most, in order of importance (list at least five names)?
Unit Two
4) Unclear Intentions — “Nothing in my life has ever worked out right, so let's party.”
- The condition I have put myself into is genetic — my parents created a mess, and I grew up in that mess, so I am a mess.
- There is no way to change my past, so there is no help for me.
- If you don't do things for me, how will my life get better?
- P — Play. I will never take life seriously.
- A — Act. I will act like no one cares about me and live in self-destruction.
- R — Rebel. I will resist any effort that makes me responsible for my actions.
- T — Take. Whatever is yours should be mine, without any effort on my part.
- Y — Yell. I will create a lifestyle so repulsive that no one will want to be near me.
5) Distorted Judgements — “I only hear rejection. Shut up, or I will shut you out.”
- To judge someone means to separate them from any agreements that improve quality of life.
- To condemn someone means to put a barricade in place that won't allow anyone to get close enough to change your behavior.
- If that repulses you, I will consider it rejection — I will never have to correct my behavior because you rejected me.
- If you do not agree with me, I will shut you out of my life.
6) Unforgiving — “I don't need you in my life, anyway.”
- The clear path to forgiving someone is full of major distractions.
- I don't need my life to be full of complications.
- There is no place for letting you into my life — or is it getting you out of my life?
- I would not have the same life if I let you off the hook.
7) Fame and No Future — “Everyone knows my name. Fame is my game.”
- The best place for me to go is where everyone knows my name — or at least my dirt, not my heart.
- If I hang out with this crowd long enough, I won't make any effort to “fix” my issues — I just have to get my “fix.”
- The thing I hate most about other people is how they lie — they say one thing and do another.
- No one is ever going to get close enough to figure out what my needs are. I will make sure they know what I think of them, so they stay away. I win.
Unit Three
8) False Intentions — “Pretending to know the facts, there is no truth.”
- When I go to meetings, I already know all the answers, because I am in control of my life.
- I never answer any questions about my life. I only tell all about what I have done.
- People in group meetings are such fakers — they turn right around and continue doing their stupid stuff.
- There is nothing discussed at group meetings that deals with my stuff anyway.
- That is why I never go to any group meetings. People can't handle the truth about their issues.
9) Dangerous Intentions — “I can mix my remedies with my festivities.”
- Bad habits can be thought of as good company.
- I know how much I need my pain remedy.
- The best place for me to be when I hurt is at some festivity, some place where people are fun to be with.
- There are better places for me to be in order to get clean, but nobody understands my issues like my friends — they accept me.
10) Nobody Knows the Trouble I've Seen — “My imagination is in control.”
- If no one recognizes my disorders, then I guess what I have must be genetic.
- If my troubles are genetic, I am going to have to live with trouble and never know what life under control will be.
- I can only use my imagination to assign values to what is happening in my life.
- If there is no answer for what is wrong with me, I will wander through life in and out of homes, classes, the street, and even eventually near death.
11) I Am in Control of My Future — “That will never happen again.”
- List the ten worst troubles you have ever been in.
- What are ten things that are horrible memories, based on your past history of getting hurt by others?
- What are five things you will never let anyone do to you again?
- What was the best commitment you ever let yourself get into?
- If you could do five things over again, what would they be?
Unit Four
12) If You Haven't Been Where I Am At, You Can't Help Me
- What are the five most important things you have learned about how to have value for yourself?
- When did you learn how to tie your shoes? When did you learn how to read and write?
- On a scale of 0 to 10, how well can you spell? How well do you read?
- Does a person have to have the exact same experiences in life to understand how it feels when something does not work out?
- Who is the best teacher — someone who fails at problem solving over and over, or someone who has learned how to solve problems no matter what they are about?
13) I Will Work on That Tomorrow — the Pain of My Past Hurts Today
- If I get out of bed today, I have to do something. I don't know what to do about yesterday.
- If I go back to bed, I can get just a few more minutes of not dealing with today.
- I wonder what other people who are like me do about their pain?
- Everyone says I will get over this crisis if I just live one day at a time.
- I just have to focus on myself and not worry about anyone else but me. Now.
14) I Can't Learn Anything New — “I Have a Learning Disability”
- I have had an evaluation that says I have a learning disability. I was diagnosed at six, and again at thirteen. I still have a learning disability.
- What are the best ten things you learned how to do for yourself? For others?
- If you could have the perfect job, what would that be?
- What is the best thing you like to do with your time? With money? With other people?
15) I Like Being Alone — “The Pressures of Life Are Not Important If I Am Left Alone”
- Where does a train go without railroad tracks?
- The final thing I have to say about that is: “leave me alone.”
- Like I've said a hundred times before: I don't need anyone.
- No, really — I don't want anyone to know where I am at.
- The only thing left for me to do... or is this the only thing left for me to do?
Recovery means that I am doing those things that are most important in life. A hurdle is defined as something I must get over so that I can progress.
The Hurdles of Recovery · Word .docx
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